All-New 2016 Car Salesperson Wows With Listening Skills

Every year new vehicles roll out to dealerships with features and upgrades, but less attention is paid to improvements on the model year of salespeople. We here at Leith have been working hard on our new salespeople, hence this review.

Exterior

We are pleased to announce that sales consultants this year will come with a variety of clothing options, multi-generational hair styles, optional eyewear, and two genders, though we’re still dominated by men as opposed to women.

New salespeople are more resistant to cold winters and accustomed to hotter summers after our scorcher last year. They move swiftly through dealership lots but are trained to announce their presence so their quiet feet don’t cause a scare.

Interior

With several regional brands of dialects, increased focuses on listening, patience, and empathy, and a renewed commitment to only show cars that match your criteria, new salespeople are seeing gains in efficiency over previous years.

We recognize that you have places to be, which makes listening of the utmost importance. The 2016 salesperson uses as much free brainpower as they can to absorb what you’re saying and match it against their internal database of vehicles.

If you know which car you want, great! If not, our salespeople will come up with potential matches for your perusal.

Performance

While the basic physical limitations of the 2016 salesperson resemble the 2015 models, new philosophies on health and exercise provide a boost in speed and ability. Thanks to a national focus on healthier food and the importance of regular exercise, new salespeople are better equipped to shepherd you the process of vehicle shopping.

If your energy starts to flag and you despair of ever walking out with a vehicle, the all-new 2016 salesperson will keep the process moving forward. They might even grab you a snack.

Safety

Equipped with rubber-soled shoes, dull clothing, harmless fingernails, and a strong financial incentive to not destroy the car they’re trying to sell, the 2016 salesperson will do everything in his or her power to ensure your wellbeing.

Taught to walk slowly, keep gestures to a minimum, and chuckle within acceptable ranges of eardrum capacity, this year’s salesperson takes safe shopping to levels previously reserved for insurance agents and actuaries.

Technology

While smartphones continue to be the rage in 2016, our salespeople are equipped with technology that we’re willing to bet you don’t carry: pen and paper. We have water, we have popcorn, we have coffee—and yes, we have the most basic—though handy—of tools for reckoning budgets.

The smartphone is great for a lot of things, but there are some times when it’s better to hear, “Use my pen.”

All-New 2016 Car Salesperson Wows With Listening Skills was last modified: November 7th, 2016 by Leith Ford
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